I'm going to do a whole debrief on this incredible CHICAGO experience that I have had with K and E Theater soon. (Because it was practically a religious experience lol). But for now, I want to share a little bit about what I have learned from a non-actor POV.
For the past 20 years, I’ve primarily worked on the creative side of the table. I’ve choreographed, led teams, and most recently directed my first show. I’m used to doing everything from the front of the room.
This year, I stepped back into a rehearsal process as an actor. That shift in perspective has been incredibly grounding. It reminded me what it actually feels like to receive notes instead of give them, to memorize instead of map, and to trust someone else’s vision instead of carrying it. It was so cool and also so terrifying lol.
Here are a few things I’m bringing back with me.
Respecting Time Is Respecting People
Respecting people’s time has always mattered to me. I believe it signals preparation and professionalism. This process, though, raised my standards.
Our director, Eddie, built a rehearsal schedule that was realistic and MAJORLY focused. He knew exactly what needed to get done and how long it would take. When we accomplished the goal early, we left early. There was no unnecessary drilling and no pushing ahead just because the space is booked.
As a performer, that kind of discipline felt incredible. Many of us are working full-time. We are commuting, managing families, and juggling responsibilities before we even step into rehearsal. When a creative team honors the schedule and releases people once the work is done, respect feels tangible.
It also builds trust. You know the room is organized. You know your time is valued. That makes you more willing to give your energy fully while you are there.
I've always considered myself really organized, but this experience opened me up to ways that I could be EVEN better. I will be even more intentional about that moving forward.
Memorizing Is Harder Than We Remember
There is something I think creative teams can unintentionally forget.
It is really hard to memorize lines, blocking, harmonies, choreography, spacing, and emotional beats while also working a full-time job. As creatives, we prepare. We teach the material. Then we go home and adjust. We refine before the next rehearsal. We edit.
Performers do not get that same flexibility. I forgot how hard it is to lock something into your brain and your body. That muscle memory, for me, took a lot of time and repetition. Vocal placement, emotional timing, beats - I probably went through a million reps to make it feel right.
So here's what I am taking away: Patience and intentional changes. When we make changes, even small ones, we are asking someone to rewire something they worked hard to encode. That does not mean we avoid changes. It means we make them thoughtfully (I am so grateful that our director was so thoughtful and collaborative about changes. I felt like my time (even out of the rehearsal room) was respected.
Anyway, being back inside that process has given me a renewed appreciation for the mental stamina performers carry.
Preparation and Flexibility Can Live Together
I am fairly known for walking into rehearsal with everything mapped out. I like knowing traffic patterns, transitions, spacing, and visual pictures before the first body hits the floor. For me, that preparation gives me confidence and helps the room run efficiently.
Eddie is also extremely prepared. The difference is that he adjusts quickly once people are in the space. He experiments in real time. He moves bodies around, tests ideas, and makes decisions based on what he sees rather than sticking rigidly to the original plan.
Watching his process has been transformative for me.
Sometimes what looks perfect on paper shifts once human beings enter the space. His willingness to adapt on the spot elevated the original idea faster than over-planning ever could. It reminded me that strong leadership can be a blend of both structure and spontaneity....I will absolutely take more of that responsive flexibility into my own process. I'm going to trust my "on-the-fly" editing and creative juices more.
An Unexpected Bonus Gift
I knew I was going to have an amazing experience as an actor because K and E Theater is notorious for putting up amazing shows, and everyone I know who has done a show there has said they've enjoyed the entire process (more on that later). But this experience has deepened my leadership in ways I did not expect.
I will continue to prioritize:
- Clear, specific notes that are actionable
- Rehearsal schedules that are realistic and efficient
- Ending early when the work is complete
- Thoughtful changes that respect memorization demands
- Collaboration
- Strong preparation paired with real-time flexibility
- Awareness of the mental and physical load performers carry
